Life Out Loud

Personal Inconvenient Truths April 3, 2009

Maybe global warming is Al Gore’s inconvenient truth–but for me, inconvenient truth is much more personal and immediate. Lately, life seems to be a series of small PITs–personal inconvenient truths.

At 2:30 a.m., the current PIT is that old dogs are as much work as puppies. Maybe more.
Puppies need a strict schedule, but they can usually go 3-4 hours without interrupting my sleep.
Casey is 14 1/2, and his PIT is that he lately he can no longer sleep through the night. Heart dog of mine, he loves to share–and so I am awake, too.

2:30 a.m., when I should be storing up zzz’s to make it through tomorrow–instead, after not quite waking enough to get him outside in time, I have cleaned a crate, cleaned up an old dog, cuddled Madison and shooed her outside (as long as we’re up, we’re ALL going to be up!) Then after settling them both back down again, the PIT that I can’t go back to sleep kicks into its own gear.

I’m borderline wide awake, blogging when I should be sleeping. PIT–once awake to a certain level, my body will only fall asleep on its own time. Too many chemo infusions, too many years of speeding through the night on a mix of Decadron and 5FU (say that out loud–yeah, now you’re getting it–5FU can be some nightmare drug.) Even meditating didn’t let me relax and go back to sleep. I know I should, though–the second shift of old-dog restlessness will kick in about 4:35 a.m. And even if I’m spared more old-dog wake-up calls, the PIT of morning will be here sooner than later.

Okay. If I fold up the netbook, I think I can try to go back to sleep again. And with any luck, maybe I’ll catch a couple more hours before the next personal inconvenient truth–morning.